Past Published Articles

Dear World, it’s me Tilly

Hello there World-

Maybe you have noticed but I’ve been posting more in my blog in the last week than probably in the last year; why? I could say because inspiration has struck, or that I am on the up-cycle of my funk, or some other shit like that, but as I am as honest as I can be, with you, and with myself, I’m not really sure why, I guess because it is meant to be.

I’ve been going through my archives (like the one below if you keep reading) and discovered- damn- I really am a good writer and a smart cookie, not bragging, just reminding myself because sometimes you get caught up in life and sucked into the vortex of the downward cycle called depression that you forget- or at least I do.

Below is a little something I wrote with new authors in mind as my audience, it was written in September of 2006- I hope you enjoy it and find it useful in your journey.

Sending love on the wings of the wind…
Tilly

tilly-rivers
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I’m not about being inside the box. As a matter of fact when my second last book was released I took a look inside the box where the seals and sharks danced in a red pool of what is termed ‘market share and competition” and pushed the box as far back as it would go. I looked up and said “You want me to dive in there? Are you nuts?”

However most of us that write and most of us that has been published and now carry the title of author think that in order to win as an author would be to be sitting on the shelf of the large bookstores like Barnes and Noble, Chapters and Indigo.

They think that to have really made it would mean that the spine of the book created by their pain, laughter, tears, frustration and hard work would be finally laying beside….oh another 80 thousand titles.

An average best seller sells about 6,000 copies in a three year term. ( National Post, August 2006) My novel sold one hundred thousand copies in fourteen days and not one of them was on a traditional book shelf. Not only did the books sell but the name of “Tilly Rivers” is recognized as one of the best writers in erotica. World Wide.

Not one book signing was at Barnes and Noble, not one book sold through Chapters. I created my own market demand; I refused to have my book collect dust on a shelf with thousands upon thousands of its cousins, with the possibility of them being put on the clearance rack, or worse, sent back to the publisher.

Now, you could say to yourself, sure, that might work for an erotica genre, but I write a different style of prose. Hmm… Okay…. I will challenge that thinking process, how many erotica novels are there? Lets just say that compared to fiction writers, romance writers, children’s books and so on, the ‘other’ categories have fifty times the competition, fifty times more sharks to add the ‘market share pond” for you the new seal to try and swim through {and make it to the other side alive} to try and sell 6,000 copies.

I always try and encourage authors to design their OWN box, sometimes they listen, sometimes they don’t. Personally I would rather have my name be the ‘only’ one noticed and have my book(s) sell and read. I would rather have readers ‘demand’ more of my books and become fans and talk about my novel(s) with their friends, but that’s just me.

You could call the way I did things: creating ‘market demand”- you know, if you wanted too. ~smiles~

You know, my Mom always said I never learned to share…

Happy Writing!

What Makes A Writer Successful?

© Copyright 2006 by Tilly Rivers: All rights reserved.

Even if I was never published again in the traditional method or otherwise I would have to write as it is a part of who I am, the substance of my true self, my inner burning fire, I truly believe that if I stopped writing that part of me would vanish, and surely I would go crazy with all those stories inside of me with no place to go. I get goose-flesh shivers at the very thought.

The question that comes up over and over again in interviews is: “What in your opinionpismo makes a writer successful?” I do not believe that writing is about sentence structure, phonics, grammar or spelling. Is this an important part of the process, of course, but is it what makes a writer successful? No. When I write, I’m not thinking about the finished product, how many words, pages or format. I don’t have a ‘recipe’ I don’t think amazing stories have a formula but an entity of its own, a living breathing thing that guides you were you need to be. I often call this flying into the mist.

A writer who understands this will be successful; it is the difference between words on a page or a journey. What makes a successful writer?  Your darkest secrets; your worst fears; countless tears; your deepest love; your sweetest dreams; your laughter. The best, and the worst of you, nothing can be held back or held in.

 

Ten Sex Tips For Men

Tilly Rivers
© Copyright Protected, 2009, Tilly Rivers. All international copyright laws are in full effect.

First off, you need to know that I am not a sex therapist or an expert of any kind; these are observations from my own personal experiences and ‘girl-talk’ from others.

The MOST IMPORTANT RULE: ASK and: never do anything that both of you are not open and comfortable with, than Ask. And ask again…..

1. Focus. When a woman feels beautiful, she acts, becomes beautiful. Her confidence f8a7f7ba873d1c45148cca33406cf606grows, her boldness& daring elevates. She is not scared to reveal (in her mind) those knobby knees, and not so cute elbows. She feels beautiful from the inside out.

2. Time. Taking the time to explore the ‘whole’ package of a woman will reap many rewards. Caress, feel, and absorb her body. A woman knows the difference (just as a man does) between a selfish “wham-bam’, get my rocks off and  true passion. Sorry guys but  being ‘into’ a woman can never be faked no matter how good you think you are at covering it up. When she feels how much you are into her, she will return the passion a hundred fold. Men can’t visibly see when a woman is turned on or off, as we do not have or lose an erection,  but this doesn’t mean they can’t tell if they are paying attention (point 1 focus), and are taking their time to enjoy her.

3. Communication. Tell her what turns you on. Ask her what she likes. Women as a rule are vain creatures and want to hear how ‘hot’ only she is making you. Again be careful. It is better to be silent if you do not mean it. This can not be faked either. If a woman seems like she isn’t into it, sometimes it is because she is scared of doing the wrong thing, or she isn’t into it, by asking her what she needs you can both enjoy a good sex life.

4. Respect boundaries. If she or he says, that isn’t for me, don’t try to convince them to do what you want, respect their choice, and at a later time you can discuss it. For example, she is uncomfortable with the thought of you going ‘down’ on her, the reason might be as simple as hygiene {your encounter wasn’t planned and she didn’t shower yet and felt self-conscious}, or maybe it is more complicated, however trying to change-her-mind during the act is going to cause bad feelings and neither of you are going to enjoy the experience.

5. Confidence. The tough-tender mixture. Inner strength not outward muscle, the essence of you, not the physical attributes, knowing he is confident, carries himself accordingly is a real turn on for a woman {and ladies- vise-versa}. That isn’t to say that ‘clumsy’ moments can not happen or be fun while having sex, the opposite actually, the imperfect moments can be a great ice-breaker, when you are relaxed, open and confident with your partner you will be able to laugh at these moments and they will become special.

6. Balance. Rough or Gentle? Depends on your partner, the mood and what everyone is comfortable with. Sexual desires shift, and when you know your partner well-you will be able to sense it. There should be times when you are happy to let him do every thing and others when you need control. Great sex can be wild but never cruel. No one can be a good lover if they do not regard their partner as an equal. Ask- are you okay with this? Don’t assume.

7. Presume. Never think that what excites one will work just as well for another. Each lady is different (same for men), sure the main ‘parts’ may be the same, but the ‘sensitive or trigger zones’ will vary.

8. Breasts. A lot of men still do not understand about breasts. They hurry. For some women her nipples are a direct hotline to her clitoris, for others not so much. Remember point two? When you take the time to get to know a woman’s body you will discover her hot buttons, which may or may not be her breasts.

9. The butt is recorded to be a major erogenous zone in both sexes. This requires stronger stimulation, holding & kneading, {slapping- if comfortable}. If you have completed points 1 to 7- this is a no brainier.

10. Skin/Touch. Fact: The smell and feel of a man’s skin probably has more to do with the attraction / repulsion than any other feature. Skin stimulation is a major factor. Touch. Texture. Temperature. Taste. Goes back to point two.

Women aren’t as complicated as you may think, just like a man, they want to feel sexy, wanted and desired, they DO NOT want to feel used. If you aren’t truly into that person, and have a ‘you’ll do’ attitude- do me a favour- walk away- I’m not talking ‘forever-after’ here, no one is expecting you to have a relationship with, or get married- just because you have sex- I’m taking RESPECT, I’m taking true desire, I’m talking passion.